Search Me Oh God…

Posted on February 27, 2012 by

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Search me oh God and know my Heart, try me and know my anxious thoughts.

This was one of the first verses that I memorized once I responded to the gospel and started following Christ. I wanted to be completely known, everything in my past that weighed me down with shame, and completely loved.

These are the  words of David in psalms 139. He begins the psalm with a declaration that God knows him, knows his heart. Even knows his actions before He moves. So why a cry to search His heart?  Why a desire to be tested before God?  In my church we sing songs about giving ourselves fully to God with vocabulary like I surrender, empty me, take me apart.  When we face God we know like David that He already sees everything.  He is deeply acquainted with my thoughts and feelings. But this cry is to be intimately known.  A cry of surrender.  Search me.  We all know that when we are searched by God he is going to bring His light into all the darkness within and everything will be exposed.  Most of the time we hope that those deep parts will remain under cover.  Yet when we are in the presence of God and we are in a position of humility, yielded to Him, we find ourselves longing to be like Him…wanting to be Holy and sanctified.  When we are undone before the one who is the lover of our soul we cry out to be fixed.  Search me oh God, try me , put my heart on trial.  I like the NLT because it puts it like this ” POINT OUT ANYTHING IN ME THAT OFFENDS YOU.”  That list could be really long.  ANYTHING that offends you!  I love confession because there is something about it that releases my soul.  The power that Satan has over me as the accuser of the brethren seems to fade, and I stand before the only judge who really matters and He says I’m forgiven.  And the weight of a burden I was never meant to carry is lifted…I can face my God completely open and free.  The inner longing that we all have to be completely known and still completely loved is satisfied.

David ends this Psalm declaring that he wants to be led on the everlasting path.  Don’t we all?  Let’s make our hearts cry like David’s.  Go boldly and humbly before your Lord and ask Him to search your heart and wait for Him to show you what offends Him and keeps you in bondage.  He is faithful to forgive and will restore. Do not be afraid.

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